Today the morning started with the usual chaos and shouting that goes on every morning, the children have school and both of us have to reach work. I kept on hurling scoldings at my kids for not getting up on time, not preparing their school bags in advance and not getting ready in time. To top it all my domestic help made some foolish mistakes which added fuel to my growing anger. Nothing new till here. When I reached the bus stop to drop my younger one I saw lots of police vehicles and the ever-curious crowd of on-lookers. Not being able to sustain my curiosity any longer I peeped down the lane where people were gathered and was wondering whether there has been a fight or a robbery. To my horror I saw a body hanging limp from a tree with a rope. He must have been a young man of no more than 20 years and looked like he committed suicide. It shook me to my roots and I uttered 'Oh my God!'. It became difficult to cover the distance of 5 minutes to home and on reaching home I broke down in front of my husband. I was shaking with the shock. Those 5 minutes to home made me think that yes, if a person commits suicide he is definitely to be held responsible for not being strong enough to hold-on to life. But what about the words of the person that triggered this step, if that was the reason. That living person probably lives throughout life, regretting and full of guilt. His life becomes much more worse than death of his loved one. I thought about my carelessness in hurling screams and scoldings at my children and thought how I don't even give it a thought, what effect it is having on the children. Even for that matter what effect these high-pitched words have on my domestic help. Watever a person does because of my actions I don't know but my reaction to his action wouldn't be lesser than living hell itself.
That was God's big way of teaching me small things.
